2007-02-26 - 9:33 a.m.
I replay past mistakes. The only difference is that this time, I'm more likely to notice them and more likely to be able to figure out what they mean and why I make them. It can be scary to think about them, among other reasons because they seem so stupid when taken out of the context of my fucked up life. But it's also liberating, because now it means I can change.My next personal goal in life is to not freeze up and try to hide it from everyone when someone really scares me. Next time, I'll find the closest person to me, even if it's a stranger, and say, "I'm afraid right now, will you stay with me until this moment ends?" I don't want to be alone and in danger any more. Ever again. Not if I can help it. To those of you in my past who have scared me, and whom I've covered up for, I am going to start telling on you. And it won't change your life at all, since you're all so far into the past. But you won't be hidden inside me any longer. I will be free.
  
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